Update...

Ben did have to have surgery yesterday for the pressure to be relieved in his brain.... it went well. If you would like to keep updated on my cousin Ben you can go to www.caringbridge.org/visit/benjaminmiller. His sister is keeping everyone posted on anything that is going on as she is there all day - everyday. Keep Praying Everyone!

Long Road Ahead...

So we had put some pictures of Ben up in his room, because it is comforting to see them for us and we were told that the nurses enjoying seeing the person they are working with how they were before because it helps them also... We found this picture today... blew it up and it is posted on the front glass of his room in ICU... :) Gotta love Ben... he's such a funny guy.

Anyways.... it was another long day today. Most of the day was the same... they had to drain his brain a few times. And he did well with his feeding today. I only went in a few times today... it's getting harder to go in and see him laying there and not be able to talk to him. We have a book that me and my mom went and got on the first day and have just been passing it around in the waiting room throughout the day... its really neat. So i just write in there what I would say to him if I could talk to him right now! Later on this evening one of his physical therapists came in and she fit him with splints for his hands to prevent contractures. She told us that starting tomorrow we will be able to go in and talk to him again and hold his hand..... we are supposed to touch the inside of his palm while talking and always repeat things for up to 4 to 5 minutes such as "open your eyes ben" just because that's how long it will take his brain to understand (for lack of a better word). Or we can just go in and talk to him if we'd like, but we're also told for only one person to be talking at a time because he can't be hearing more than one voice or noise because it will confuse him.

It's scary... also within the next few days/weeks they will be running tests to see what kind of damage to the brain stem has been done which is really going to determine alot of his response to things as I understand it. As his sister Tara has said we are just trying to prepare ourselves right now from no response to a full recovery. And we are in it for the long haul!!

I'm going back to work tomorrow... although I'd rather just be there. Not really sure what to do about this weekend. I know there are a lot of people at the hospital, but it just feels like I should be there, but then again this is going to be a long period of time and I'm going to have to be working to.... I just dont' know what to do! Just cant wait for the moment to talk to him again or to just even know for a fact that he is goign to live just with a lot of rehab...

I went in and saw him right before we left tonight... we weren't supposed to be in there but the nurse let me anyways :) She said that his numbers were getting up high again and she might have to drain in a few minutes and so I asked her about the monitors and where she was looking.... she paused for a minute... smiled... finally pointed them out to me and then immediately said hunny you dont' worry about those numbers that's my job just worry about praying and taking care of him. She was sweet... and it's nice to have such good nurses there!

Keep Praying!!

Wednesday...

So Ben had a rough night last night they had to drain his brain about 6 times within an hour and at about 1 the nurse was preparing to call the neurosurgeon if Ben's brain fluid levels stayed above 20 again for more than five minutes. But we didn't end up having to call the surgeon and he had remained stabalized staying between a level of 11-14! That was up until 8:30 this morning... shortly after that we met with the neurosurgeon who updated us on Ben's status. Currently there are two fronts that Ben is working on. The first is trying to keep his intracranial pressure at levels that will not do further damage to his brain. The second is the healing of the brain stem. He told us that Ben will have a CAT scan tomorrow to check on the brain stem. While there is no change in Ben's neurological assessment today, that the first 1-2 weeks after the injury will tell a lot in terms of long term prognosis. The great news that he gave us is that he believes Ben is approaching the peak of brain swelling and that the swelling should start to subside by the end of this evening. He also told us that his belly is waking up and is making some gurgling noises, so they are going to continue attempts with feeding.

Keep praying everyone... its going to be a long journey!!

End of Tuesday Night....

Well, we were told that the second and third days of Ben's journey would be the worst...we are starting to see that. We are still being encouraged not to talk to him or touch him, since it is too stimulating for him to handle.

As of 8 pm, Ben had the fluid drained off of his brain twice more. We are happy to see that his heart and lungs are strong and functioning correctly. Praise the Lord! However, they attempted to feed him through a tube in his mouth and it was not successful. Ben didn't receive the food well - probably because it looks like brown paste and is dripping through a tube in his mouth.

At 9:20 pm he had another drain - then they had to drain again at 9:35 pm. We were told that the maximum amount of swelling would occur during the second and third days of Ben's battle. We are seeing their predictions right now. But we have not lost hope at all...our Ben has already overcome a blood clot on the right side of his brain and has made it 32 hours without having to have a major surgery! He has already made small steps toward recovery and we are waiting patiently to see even more!

A great saying I always think of when something hard comes along in life, my uncle marks nurses had given him a sign when he was battling cancer, and it fits perfectly along with Ben also!

"It's not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog!"

Keep praying everyone!
We are at the hotel room for the night and we'll be returning to the hospital in the morning! I will keep everyone updated!

Update on Ben!!

Ben did well overnight. They had to drain the blood from his brain twice. And they took him off of his sedatives so he can unfortunetly feel the pain but we are told that is a "good thing". We weren't allowed to see him from 12-3 today because they were going to have to drain the brain again around 2. My uncle Tom, ben's dad, went in at one point and was talking to him like we had been doing since we have been allowed to see him because they say even when unconcious he can still here us. But when my Uncle went in there to talk to him it caused the brain swelling to shoot up. (The number we are looking at for the brain swelling is between 1 and 25. If the numbers go up and stay up between 17 and 25 for 5 minutes they have to drain the brain.) So right now the nurse has asked us not to talk to him or touch him because it causes to much of a stimulus.She said that right now the best way she could describe what Ben was feeling was like a migraine. She said that when someone has a migraine they want all the lights off, don't want to be around anyone, and don't want to hear anything or be touched. While it is hard for us to stare at him through the glass and not be in the room with him anymore, we know that it is best for Ben right now. They have started feeding him through a tube today, so that's good. The waiting room receptionist said she has never seen so many people come through to visit someone like Ben has had...he has no enemies in the world! It is going to be a slow process and a lot of waiting, but we are all praying for the best.

Thank you for continuing to pray and believe that God can work miracles. He has made it 27 hours now. We have been told that the first few days will be the most rough, and the most critical.

Keep Praying!!

Please Pray!

My cousin Ben was in a motorcycle accident yesterday afternoon in Carbondale. He was going a little fast around a curve and lost control. Thank god he was riding with a friend and an ambulance was called right away. They life lined him to Evansville where we were told there wasn't much of a chance because of the blood clot in his brain and the swelling. His brain stem is also bruised. But about an hour later they did a reassement before surgury and the blood clot had dissappeared and the swelling hadn't gotten any worse since he'd been there so he was just put on a monitor to watch the swelling. They say these next two days are going to show whether or not the brain will swell. And he is still not awake due to the bruised brain stem. My cousin has a long road ahead of him! Please pray for his healing!! I got to see him right before we left yesterday and he actually looks good no scraps or anything on his face or body really just a gash in his leg/ankle... which is taken care of. He's a strong person and will pull through this just keep him in your thoughts and prayers! I will keep everyone updated as time goes on! It's just a waiting game now!

Birthday Wishes... a little late!

In the past month or so there have been a few birthdays that I haven't mentioned!

The most recent was my Aunt Kims!! And we celebrated in style.. :) Me, Samee, Sus, mom, and aunt kim all went out to eat. Here is mom and aunt kim at stables for after dinner drinks and dessert! Happy Birthday Aunt Kim! You are very special to me! Love you! Sus... being a dork at olive garden! lol

Me and Samee and our fruity drinks! I don't remember what they were called but it was a very good choice Samee!!

When they brought out my second drink he didn't bring a little straw so I stuck my big straw in there and we all thought it was pretty funny at the time and it deserved a picture! :)

Samee, Sus, and Me enjoying drinks and dessert at Stables!!

Me and Mom at Stables!

Also recently these two pretty little girls celebrated birthdays!! Alex celebrated hers in February and Callista just a few weeks ago... So Happy Birthday Girls! Love you!

AND... Syd celebrated her 11th birthday a few weeks ago also! So Happy Birthday Syd!! Love you very much!!

Last Call...

So... last night I worked from 6 to close... like I do every sunday. Sometimes I get to close early if no one is inthere but we were steady all night... so at about 10 till one I caled last call, got everyone there drinks, and continued to clean the backbar so I could get out of there as soon as we closed. I look up and 2 guys and a girl walk in. The first guy... I would say he is about 24 or so sits down and says i need three coors lights... he was already drunk so I said sorry I've already called last call and I'm closing in 5 minutes. Starts cussing and yelling, and then the next guy oh i'd say 45 or so starts screaming and cussing saying it was bs that they couldn't get served wouldn't stop yelling. (So at this point i should have called the police...but i just wanted to go home so i freakin served them) Did they stop being rude... Nope!! OH... and the women with them apoligized once and the older man was like don't freakin apoligize to her its her freakin job!! That pissed me off! So a few people I know from Effingham were in there and they were just like stop yelling and cussing dude she served you be happy... So the younger guy gets all cocky and telling them (which are two girls and a guy i might add) that he's going to kick there ass!

So finall 1 am... i flip on the lights and don't even tell them to leave yet i finished my cleaning and was going to let them sit there till i was done... BUT no... the stupid girl that was with them has to mouth off and scream "Now this is when you call last call, serve us again." I turned around and was like EVERYONE OUT!!! The older guy tipped me a quarter, I said sir you can keep that I wouldn't want to put you out of anything! HA

So they walk out the front, and the other three and myself walk out hte back. So we're talking about what just happened and the younger guy comes running at us screaming and so i was like screw it... I called the police! And by this time the other guy and girl had made it over there and then about 6 cops pull up and surround them it was cool! lol

And the best part, the cop gave me the option of banning them from the bar! Ha... that'll teach you to scream at the bartender!

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome?

So the past month or so I've noticed how tired I've been, and so I cut back on going out during the week because I am working more so I just assumed I'm needing more sleep. But that didn't really help because I would still stay up late sometimes even at home, so I started going to sleep earlier but I still was having a really hard time getting up in the morning. Now I'm not saying that I used to like getting up in the morning or anything but I was alwasy pretty good about getting up on time. Anymore... I just hit snooze. And now I can hardly stay out past 10:00 pm on the weekends... I'm thinking what is going on? I'm 19! 3 months ago I was staying out til wee hours of the morning on a friday night and then getting up and going to work the next day.

So I got to thinking about what is really going on, because I've slept plenty to be able to catch up on the sleep I may have missed by doing to much partying. So I googled! :) And Chronic Fatigue Syndrome is what I have come up with! And I have always had neck and back problems but I have def. noticed an increase in the pain in them the past month or so. So that's my conclusion, which sucks because from my research there is nothing you can do except de-stress your life!

So if anyone has suggestions on what I should try next, let me know! I'm up for anything! Just sick of being so tired all the time!!

Update on The Office!

It's about 12:45 and I've just recently got home from working at the office tonight. I went in a little early today and worked some extra hours which is always good... more money!! But we also closed early... which is fine cause I was tired!! But i'm getting closer to having enough to buy me a new vehicle! I can't wait!! Anyways I know alot of people have been saying there are going to get over there and see me but really how many people go out on a sunday night or monday... so I thought I'd let everyone and anyone know I'm working my first Saturday night on March 28th.... COME SEE ME! :) So anyways... I'm going to bed! Everyone have a good week!!